Now Accepting applications for a Japanese girlfriend


So, I’m not really looking for a Japanese girlfriend (Link is SFW, website is NSFW), per se. Just need a girlfriend in general.

But what’s the rush? Well, first off, my sister has been married for 4+ years and is due to have Madalyn Faith Williams any day now. And as of about 6 hours ago, my brother is engaged to be wed (Congrats Chris – Palmercat gal is a good catch). That leaves me high and dry as the only Smith child to not be married or have the prospects of this occurrence happening any time soon. That’s what I get for being the shy one. And for not going to church, like my brother and sister do, well… religiously.

It’s been 2.5 years since Courtney. And I have had zero relationships in that time. Man, do I feel pathetic. But what do I do to increase my chances?

First off, I have got to get out more. And I don’t mean bars and clubs. I mean normal places like bookstores, coffee shops, etc. Also, I could look for a church that I feel comfortable at. I certainly never liked how fake everybody was at SBC through High School; and even when I came back 5 years later and tried out the college group, nothing had changed. Plus, there was the “Wade” incedent. The one thing that I think SBC still has going for them is Darryl DelHousaye. He is an amazing speaker.

I don’t know… I guess it’s time to prepare myself for the constant jabbing that I will be receiving from my family. I have a lot of learning to do before I can perfect my imitation of Jerry Jester.

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5 responses to “Now Accepting applications for a Japanese girlfriend”

  1. You could try my church. I’ve not been to SBC, but the people where I go seem to be pretty non-phoney from my standpoint.